Boat Season is Upon Us

posted by arbogast @ 3:29pm, Tuesday 11 February 2014.

It has been written that boat season was created for man, not man for boat season.

In other words, it is incumbent upon all people everywhere to enjoy the splendors of the open water on a high-octane speedboat. You may doubt that honoring boat season is a necessity to your happiness, but in that doubt, you would be most definitely wrong! Let's examine the facts surrounding the importance of honoring boat season in your own life.

Before we go any further, don't forget you view our complete boat inventory by clicking on the logo to the right.

Fact 1

Boat season is inseparably tied to tan, beautiful skin. A nicely bronzed skin is the reward for those who wear the proper attire while boating and spend ample time frolicking in the water. The result of not participating in boat season could be tragic. For many people, the only time they see the sun is when they are boating and swimming in the lake. If such people don't dedicate the proper time to boating, there is a good chance their beauty will be diminished because of a lacking tan. Everyone knows the secret to a successful love life is beautiful skin, and everyone knows the secret to beautiful skin is an even tan; everyone also knows it's hard to tan without going to the lake and going boating during boat season. It's common sense.

Fact 2

Spending time on a new boat is a key element to a successful life. Most people do not know this, but success must first be projected before it can be fully realized. Is there anything that projects success to the world more than owning your own boat? A person who owns their own own boat owns a launch pad of success. People look at you differently when you own a boat. There is also the fact that when you own a boat you spend more time relaxing in the sun, which is the perfect place to come up with successful ideas. Owning a boat coupled with the beauty of tan skin will more likely than not lead to all your dreams coming true. Quite frankly, it's inevitable.

Fact 3

Honoring boating season every year will help you have an active social life. Even if people do not like you for who you are, they will like you if you have a nice boat for them to spend time on. In the end, friends are friends whether they like you or not. Sometimes frenemies make the best boating pals, especially if they aren't as good as you at water skiing. This will give you an opportunity to show off your skills for anybody in your party you are interested in dating.


The logic regarding boat season is simple: In order to have a happy, fulfilling life, you must go boating during the appointed season. In order to go boating in the appointed season, you must own your own boat. If you own your own boat, you will have tan skin, be successful, and date whomever you wish.

*Editor's Note: (This blog is meant to be humorous, please don't take literally)

Originally posted by: Darrin Michael on Wednesday, 13 February, 2013

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